End of the World’s End
By Aaron 6/3/2007

Apparently, the many people who fled the scene of Pirates 3 missed the “secret ending” that only the “lucky” got to see by staying to watch until the end of the credits. While I think it is truly fitting that someone who could bear three hours of Pirates 3 could bear the credits and then somehow not kill themselves upon seeing the “secret ending.”

Gore Verbinski must have decided that the movie wasn’t confusing or corny enough, so he tacked on this scene. The ending was available for a short time on youtube, but has since been taken down. So if you really want to see it that badly, you have to suffer through another three hours of Pirates 3. Or you could just read my synopsis below.

The ending begins with the classic corn of “ten years later.” And surprise! We see Kiera walking to the ocean to wait for Orlando Bloom, with (another real shock) a ten year old child. They smile and hold hands as they look out onto the water and you see Orlando Bloom looking the exact same as he did previously (Kiera as well of course).

If that didn’t make you throw up in your mouth or make you want to learn how not-to-read, I’ll discuss why I think that ending further damages one of the most enjoyable (and profitable franchises).

Showing Kiera ten years later, seemingly doing nothing except raising a child kind of precludes her from any possible role in a movie about the search for the holy-grail-type-thingy Jack and Barbosa are searching for. Also, Orlando SHOULD NOT look the same – why doesn’t he have some deformation, like Davey Jones had because he had to live under the sea for some time? Oh well, I guess since the rest of the movie didn’t make a lot of sense, the “secret ending” shouldn’t have to.

Could “Avatar” Win Best Picture?

By Brett Hogan

 

Last week, the trailer for James Cameron’s sci-fi experiment “Avatar” debuted. While initially unimpressed with the teaser, I began to wonder: Could this film win best picture? 

 

Buzz has been generating for this movie for years. Years. The technology to make this movie didn’t exist when Cameron conceived it, so he invented it. When is the last time you heard of a director spearheading the invention of anything? The casting started in 2005. Most movies these days, even epics, are done in half that time. I could go on. 

 

The most important thing to take away from all of this is that people are saying this will be the future of movies. Now, I don’t agree with the idea that CGI will become more prevalent than it already is. But I do believe that this will set the bar miles higher for sci-fi. I mean, that is what Titanic did. And that won some awards if memory serves.

 

I’ll bet you’re asking yourself, how can you even suggest that a film like this will win Best Picture when the initial trailer was nothing better than visual stimulation? Well, there are a couple of reasons. First, the Academy has expanded Best Picture to ten films. This doesn’t guarantee anything other than improved chances for most films on the cusp.

 

Second, after last year’s Oscars debacle, which saw the best film of the year, “The Dark Knight,” not only get shafted in awards but nominations as well, the Academy is pulling out all the stops to appease those with the loudest voices in the film industry, the fanboys. Now, the Academy probably didn’t lose anything because of that other than some viewers of the award show. Perhaps if people are again outraged with the winners or nominees, the heads of the Academy would lose their jobs. So this is all about the Academy protecting itself, which is not so outrageous.  

 

 

Third, there is an economic motive here. I’ve heard this film will cost $190 million, not counting the R&D costs associated with Cameron’s inventions or the cost of getting 3-D cameras into every theater in the country. The Academy will do everything in its power to get people into the seats and make this the next “Titanic” or “The Dark Knight.” But the Academy doesn’t have much power, besides nominating and awarding, so they will slap the “Nominated for Best Picture” moniker onto every commercial and print ad to get the people who didn’t believe the critics to relent and see this movie.

 

Of course, all of this is pure conjecture, and no revolutionary film (Terminator 2, Jurassic Park, etc.) has ever won the Best Picture category because it changed the game. Except maybe Titanic. But still, could this movie actually win? My answer is no but a nomination is certain and who knows what could happen from there. We’ll know more come February 2010.